live love.

again another morning post.
but for a different reason today.
i’m going to the girls volleyball playoff game tonight which is somewhere about 2 hours from here so with game time at 7 and the drive back, won’t be home till late and will need to go to sleep pretty much right away seeing as i will have one more set of finals to take the next day.

now i know some people are not morning people at all and i can understand that.
but for me waking up early is just fine as long as i have had adequate sleep.
i have begun to notice somethings about mornings, mainly something i noticed while re-reading what i wrote yesterday morning.
i listed more reasons that God was good than i had on my previous afternoon post.
now i like to ask why when i see something different.
so i did.
and i think that i can tend to be more thankful in the morning right after i have waken up and right before i go to bed.
whether this is right or wrong healthy or not i am just going to state what i have found true in my own life.

right when i wake up(after going to the restroom right away of course)
i desire to recognize God immediately and thank Him for the new day, the new start, another chance to live out His love, and am genuinely desiring that i begin the day with Him hoping to continue the day in Him.
but then shortly there after i can get caught up in the rush of oh i forgot to do this or i need to wrap this up before i leave and before i know it my morning is gone and i’m barely ready as i scramble out the door.
and then the day goes on and i spend little time thinking on God and little time just being still and hanging with Him.
then evening comes, and i get homework done, check blogs, check scores, check a few other sites for anything new, talk to friends, photoshop, draw, work out(not so much anymore but im trying to get back into it), and whatever thing i may end up doing, but again often little time is spent talking with my Savior.
(if i were to break down the minutes of my day actually spent with God, i am sure it is not where it should be)

now occasionally i do have days when i feel really tight with God and am thinking on Him much of the day and have taken time to just be still and know that He is God.
but more often than not i find myself in too big of a hurry or doing something i want to do or feel needs to be done.
in fact sometimes i love being busy more than i love God.

is it ok that i am so inconsistent?
is it ok to have the high lights of my spiritual life be twice a day?

i would have to say no.
it is not alright.
God is anything but inconsistent.
and we are to be in His image.
we are to imitate His very being.
that of holiness, goodness, love, and consistency.

when moses asked God for His name.
He replied “I AM”
He isn’t different sometimes or depending on the situation.
He just is and always is.

to prove how inconsistent i really am i offer this example.
if you were to look back far enough through all my post will you find a couple posts on inconsistency.
i even wrote a poem about it which a friend is writing music for.
i even designed a graphic to express my frustration with inconsistency in my own life.
i wrote the poem and the song as ways to make it known to myself and to remind myself of my own failure and need for improvement.
and yet here i am.
post numero quatro of attempt at consistency.
i can add “writing a post everyday for 7 days straight” to the poem and graphic.

i am sick of high’s and lows.
i am sick of inconsistency.
i am sick of how often i have typed or said that.

when is life change going to happen.
i have not fully learned this concept obviously.
because learning is proven by life change.
i think i have partially learned as i believe i have seen some life change, but not the type of change that comes from full learning and full belief and totally 100 percent buying into something.

i know this a bit of a longer post.
some of the things i have said may not have made much sense.
some of that is me.
some of that though also that i have drawn from many previous posts.
to check those out just scroll on down all the way to the bottom.

i have a few other things i want to write but i’ll save that for another day.
make it easier to have something to write about in the next few days as i attempt consistency.
that and this is probably too long anyhow.

i’m not giving up though.
God has made certain promises i know that He will keep them.
i just need to start acting on faith a little more.

love to you all.
may we wish the best for each other and lift one another up for the glory of our Savior.

This entry was posted Tuesday, November 6th, 2007 at 6:49 am and is filed under life, thoughts. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.